At what age can a child decide which parent to live with?
Short answer
In Quebec, no rule of law sets an age at which a child decides for themselves which parent they live with. The court must take the child's opinion into account according to their age and power of discernment, but the decision is made in the child's interest and rests with the judge.
In detail
This is probably the most widespread myth in Quebec family law. There is no magic age — not 10, not 12, not 14 — at which the child chooses. The test remains the child's interest, and the judge assesses how much weight to give the child's opinion based on their maturity and power of discernment.
There is, however, one situation where the law gives decisive weight to the child's wishes: personal relations with grandparents. The Quebec government indicates that the wishes of a child aged 14 or over must be respected in that regard, so that no agreement is possible if a child aged 14 or over refuses, and the child can put an end to it without any other formality. For children aged 10 to 13, their consent may be required depending on the circumstances.
That rule concerns relations with grandparents and does not turn a 14-year-old into the decision-maker on their own custody.
What to document
What the child says, when and to whom — without questioning them or drawing them into the conflict. Note observable facts instead: refusing to leave, changes in behaviour, things said spontaneously, dates and context. A dated journal is worth more than a memory reconstructed months later.
Put your facts in writing, free. Writing your version down early, keeping your documents dated and preparing your questions for a lawyer: the tool is there to document, never to advise.
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Official sources
- Gouvernement du Québec — Principles applied in determining custody of a child
- Ministère de la Justice du Québec — Children: a shared responsibility
Related questions
- My child refuses to go to their other parent — can I keep them?
- My ex is not complying with the custody judgment — what can I do?
- Can I move with my child without the other parent's consent?
- How is child support calculated in Quebec?
- In shared custody is there still child support?
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What this page is not
This is general legal information about the law of Quebec and Canada, dated and sourced. It is not legal advice, not a strategy, and not a prediction about the outcome of a case. In Quebec, only lawyers and notaries may give legal advice (Act respecting the Barreau du Québec, ss. 128 and 133). Laws and amounts change: the official source always prevails over us.